New Year, New Me (I guess)

Not sure what 2014 holds for me.

But I have BIG plans.

Just did a vision board journal for 2014 and I plan to make this a year that stands out.

In Dec 2013, I did a few housekeeping things, which included determining whether my ex husband wanted to try again.

He basically told me he wanted to get himself together first and for us to revisit this in a few months.

 I took that as a "No"

I'm not going to waste my time this year on people who don't want to waste their time with me.

I am going to try to be a better friend.

Work on my health.

Work on my financial fitness

And basically work on my mental health which has been in dire straits over the last few years.

This year is about me.

I am not going to worry about getting a man, or having a baby or proving something to someone or any of the other things that crossed my mind that weren't for my benefit.

My three year plan includes finding a mate, but year number 1 is to get myself together and to be the woman the man I want, would want.

So wish me luck.

Not Really What You Want To Read...

Definition of Vacation

 

1. a period of suspension of work, study, or other activity, usually used for rest, recreation, or travel; recess or holiday: Schoolchildren are on vacation now.

 

2. a part of the year, regularly set aside, when normal activities of law courts, legislatures, etc., are suspended.

 

3. freedom or release from duty, business, or activity.

 

4. an act or instance of vacating.

 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

 

In this context I didn't really lie. I DID go on vacation. It wasn't necessarily for recreation or travel, but it was indeed for rest.

 

You see, I had a 50 day vacation in a psych hospital.

 

From September 26th to November 15th.

 

Yes, I counted the days.

 

 

 

I still can't believe I practically missed Fall. It was warm when I went in, and deathly cold when I came out. So much for being able to wear my cute fall jackets.

 

While inpatient, I underwent excessive therapy, extreme medicinal changes, an overdose of cognitive classes and most extreme, a process called ECT, Electo Convulsive Therapy. Which, if it had to be compared to anything, would be most like Shock Treatment.

 

Yes, I underwent brain stimulation to attempt to cure me of my disorder. Wild huh?

 

 

 

Nonetheless, nothing seemed to work, and my insurance kicked my out after 50 days of making zero progress. (Well, some progress was made according to my doctors, but according to me, I left worse than I came in).

 

I've been battling my feelings, my past, my parts for a while. It has seemed to have gotten excessively worse lately.

 

Things, little and big, make me emotional, stress me out and overwhelm me to the point of non-functioning.

 

Since, being home for a bit, I've gotten a bit more control over my emotions and my medicine. When I first arrived home, I had apparently been taken so much medicine that I was practically overdosed for the first few days and couldn't function, so my psychiatrist basically halved everything to see if that would fix the problem (which it did).

 

There are a lot more things I could and would tell you about what I've been up to since June. It is all actually quite interesting, but most likely something you don't really want to read from a blog, that normally post outfit post.

 

But, I just wanted to get it out there why it seemed my vacation was so excessively long, and why my blog has been so extremely quiet.

 

I'm not sure if I plan to post outfit post anytime soon, to be honest.

 

After I got over the overdost, I've worn some pretty cute things if I do say so myself, but the motivation to set up my tripod and primp and pose in front of the camera has gone down the drain.

 

THank you anyway for those who have checked on me occaisionally, and those who have actually read this far into this post.

 

Hopefully, I'll be back soon.

 

Take Care

 

Jen L

I'm On Vacay - Be Back Soon!!

Quotable Sunday - Mental Illness

 

 

Telling someone with mental illness to

"pull themselves together" is just as

 helpful as

  telling someone with AIDS to "just snap

out of it"

 

 

 

Phillip Lim For Target Items - Return or D.I.Y.?

Okay, remember when I told you I ordered the following items offline from th e3.1 Phillip Lim collection for Target?

Well, I ordered all XL's and 16's. Thinking if they had enough stretch I could get them to fit.

Well, I'll start with the pieces I've received and discuss their fit and fabric on a size 18 top and a size 20 bottom person.

Whose that person I speak of?

No Dad, Really, I'm Not Going "Clubbing"

#Fall Wish List - Asos At It Again - I'm Obsessed

It's late at night, or rather early in the morning and I haven't slept a wink. 

So, I decided to do some window shopping and put some items from Asos on my fall wish list. 


I really am trying to get more into separates as I am kind of getting tired of the convenience and monochrome look of a dress.

Although most items below are separates, there are still some dresses that I couldn't overlook, listed at the bottom.

Gothy Gurl Want List - Hot Topic

Just a list of things that appeal to my Inner Goth!!

'

Dictionary Definition of Goth

a person of no refinement; barbarian.

Definitely not my definition!

Check out these CUTE items below!

Gwynnie Bee - Blue and White Tie Dye

Flying Into Fall With Wingz - OOTD and Review

Jumper: MICHAEL Michael Kors /  Sleeves: Wingz Fashion / 

Booties: Dolce Vita via Barefoot Tess

When The Clock Strikes Twelve, Changes Begin Happening

Welcome, Welcome, Welcome!!!

Pow! Zap! Wow! Life With Dogs

Why do my eye ALWAYS look closed??

Just Something Interesting

This piece of art has been stationed outside my therapists office for I don't know how long.

At first it was a bright, shiny metal color, then it became a bit rusted and then for the longest time it became rusted and bronzed.

Eventually, someone decided to paint it white (Which was probably just a base color, but it ended up staying that way for a while) then finally it was painted orange and yellow.

I kind of always wanted to take a picture of it because it is quite interesting. As well, it is the only piece of art for miles around, which is kind of awkward and weird.

Why put it here in this particular office area? Who made it? Did anyone commission it or is it just a donation? What does it mean? Does it have any significance to the types of offices that are located near it?

There are so many questions that go through my mind every time I walk past this structure. I guess I could always ask my therapist if she knows anything about it, but I guess the best part of enjoying art is having the ability to question it....

So I just stare at it occasionally, enjoy it and walk on.

Absolutely Fabulous, If I Do Say So Myself!!!

Vested Blazer - Big Beauty X Jean Marc Philippe  /  Tank Top: Asos /  Leggings; Domino Dollhouse / Jewelry: Various

My Cast Is Cooler Than Your Cast

My foot cast is cooler than your cast!!!

I call him Bootsey for short....

Phew!! And It's Still Early

After the excitement and the rush of partaking in LimSanity aka Phillip Lim's collaboration with Target, I knew I wanted to wear something comfy today.

No real plans do anything special except to go grocery shopping. Since the mail doesn't come on Sundays, I have a break from receiving any boxes.

Phillip Lim For Target and Other Stuff I Grabbed On The Way

Sooo, if you haven't heard, Phillip Lim is coming out with a capsule collection for Target. It is, of course (and apparently), a pretty big deal.

Our Attire Usually Says More Than We Mean

Finally, Separates featuring De-mes-tik's New York

This is finally a post about wearing separates. This is the second skirt I bought from Demestiks New York on Etsy.

Comic Sans: Some May Think I'm Too Honest

Wore this today. I know I was supposed to wear separates but I couldn't help myself!!
But separates it will be tomorrow.

This comic print dress and my purse and jewelry gave a lot of little homages to comic book fans.